Had the most incredibly emotional dream and to tell you every detail about it would fill a novel. It was intense and long. I woke in tears. If I even tell someone about it it sounds so stupid. There must be a lot going on inside me that I'm processing. Maybe the dreams are somehow dealing with it. I should be completely well after this dream with all the exhaustion I experienced when I woke up.
The dream was like many that I have, being that much of it is me watching a film in a theatre and the dream being the film. I'll try my best to give you the short version.
I had traveled back to my old hometown to visit. I was having dinner with an old girlfriend and her family and her mother mentioned the old theatre we used to go to on dates was being demolished and we should go to see their last film before it was gone. She even said we should try and buy a few old seats and the curtains at the auction. My friend told her daughters we were going on a date and the eldest daughter began getting very upset that the place where we first kissed was being destroyed and how modern society treats culture as a disposable commodity.
We drove to the theatre and had difficulty finding it as it was hidden behind new glass building. The place was small and we entered and took our seats. The film had already started and the film was a horror film, I believe about a single father in his 60s who was incestuously involved with his teen daughter who had become pregnant by the son of a preacher. The old man called the boyfriend to meet him in the woods to get firewood for church. When the boy arrived the old man shot him in the head and as he was trying to bury the body his daughter and her friend from school arrived and began screaming. He tied them up and began raping them. The screams from the girls attracted a black man who had escaped from prison. The old man was off in the shed to get the ax to chop the girls up. The black man began raping the girls again and when the old man saw this he chopped the man's head off with the ax.
My date in the theatre began crying very uncontrollably and I asked her why and she explained to me she knew the girls from her high school. It was then I discovered this was a true story.
In the film everyone was bad and so was the acting, the old man, the daughter, the escaped prisoner, the boyfriend... But in the end the old man was treated as a hero for killing the prison escapee. People came to his rescue because of the death of his daughter and he became a media darling with interviews on all sorts of TV shows even with all the horrible things he did.
After the film was over my date cried and cried. Somehow she was all caught up in the story. She knew the girls, she had dated the boyfriend, she even told me she had married another guy arrested for digging up graves and stealing the jewelery off the corpses and she even had been involved with the black rapist prisoner! I asked, being rather racist, "How could you date a black rapist?"
She told me she had made lots of mistakes, but had always tried to do good and added, "I wasn't emotionally strong and after it happened, it had already happened, so there was nothing I could do about it. I just didn't look back. I kept moving forward."
Suddenly we're sitting on the hood of my car which was a 66 Oldsmobile talking about her life choices, then I was across a field that had been freshly tilled and I was watching us talk on the car. I could see her and me talking. Suddenly a horse was behind me with a nude girl sitting up on it bareback.
The nude girl whispers to me from on top of the tall horse, "She's always trying to make the right choice, but she can't. You've always been the right choice for her, but you have refused to be chosen by her, so how can she win?"
Just typing this dream out makes it seem so stupid, but I'm telling you it was deeply painful and all so emotional. That's not even half of it, it went on and on! I was so worn out when I woke up. I was thankful it was over.
I haven't completely figured out what it all meant, but some of it I have and I'm glad my waking life isn't too much like my dream life.
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