Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Not a week goes by there isn't some friend asking me, "Where is your...
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
I wish I could cook!
Monday, March 29, 2010

I'm so ready for a change in my life!
I can't stand myself. Boring. Depressed. Fat. Bald. Back Hair. Ugly. Stupid. Big Footed. Bad Speller. Horrible Grammar.
So want to be someone else for a change! Want to do something different with my life. Start a new life!
I look at all the job sites, Yahoo, Monster, Simply Hired, Craigslist... Nothing looks good. Can't do any of them. What is a good industry now anyway?
Keep thinking maybe I need to move to another country. Maybe there are better jobs over there? Where ever that is. Maybe some other country would love to have an American like me around like a mascot, maybe I'd stand out?
Do I really want to work anyway? I hate work! I know I have skills. Just no visibly marketable skills. I send out resume after resume and I get nothing.
When I'm out in the world walking around, shopping, going places... I never see anyone my age! Where are they? I never see them in offices, in stores, in factories. I look around to my friends that are like me, or maybe a lil' bit like me and they all work for themselves.
Is it too late for me to recreate myself into something fantastic? Am I too old? I need to figure out how I can stay hidden, indoors, away from people, working alone, by myself and still generate enough income to keep my extravagant lifestyle. What can I do?
I read all the time in biographies and nonfiction books how someone gives a guy a job, or recommends them, or finds and mentors them and they become great. I've never had that!
Am I that unlovable?
Sunday, March 28, 2010

Sleep is not working for me lately. Could it be broke?
I'm so tired, but sleep won't come to me easily. It needs to be coaxed. It acts like a mule that won't budge. I try, but it's no use.
I drift. I become weightless. Then I feel someone else is in the room. I toss and turn. I sigh and flip my pillows, but it's no use.
Again, I start to drift off. Sleep slides over me like a soft blanket. I sink deeper into the bed.
Then, I'm startled by the feeling of another presence in the room. Someone is here. Watching me. I'm scared.
I don't dare open my eyes. I don't think it's a ghost. I don't think it's an alien.
What scares me more than anything is that if I look, it might be me standing there looking back!
Saturday, March 27, 2010

Sinking down you're not climbing
Sinking feeling you're not trying
Sinking ships made of paper dreams
All your hopes and dreams are screaming
It's you that I've always wanted
but I lost you
too scared to call, I never knew
I wanted, I wanted, I wanted,
but nothing ever came through
Made it so hard to want again
It's so true
You put all you hopes in prayers
like notes to God in a balloon
The storm is rising, but you will be saved
for you're the message in a bottle
you will not drown
not at all
I once thought you were lost
but turns out it was me
How could I not see
I'm the one that never believed in me
But you
You always believed in me
you always believed in me
you always believed in me
Friday, March 26, 2010
Today I feel so stuck!
Thursday, March 25, 2010
I'm so sick of people using the phrase, "Think outside the box!"
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Kicking around the idea of jumping in my car and hitting the road!
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
I used to love playing cards!
Monday, March 22, 2010
If it's Weird, You'll Hear it Here!
http://jerrylentz.podomatic.com/On Blubrry!
http://www.blubrry.com/jerrylentz/The Feed!
http://www.jerrylentz.com/podcast/podcast.xmlOn the Facebook Podcast Fan Page!
http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Jerry-Lentz-Podcast/147698714963On iTunes!
http://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?id=304095539
Sunday, March 21, 2010
It's Sunday, there's snow and ice and cold outside...
Saturday, March 20, 2010
I give and I give and I give...!
Friday, March 19, 2010
Been looking for the perfect desk for my needs...
Thursday, March 18, 2010
It's like I have the power to cloud a man's mind... My own Mind!
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
I wanted to get all Green today!
I miss him so much! But now I can have my very own Conan O'Brien Leprechaun! They're always after his Lucky Charms!http://tinyurl.com/yajxazhThey're Magically Delicious! Dang, I'm hungry! Hearts, Moons, Stars, Clovers... Hmm, Hearts. That should be low carb, right?Isn't a heart just meaty muscle?
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
If you love Animation, Filmmaking and Art, this podcast episode is for you!
http://www.refresheverything.com/deceptiveDragonEnjoy the show!On Podomatic!
http://jerrylentz.podomatic.com/On Blubrry!
http://www.blubrry.com/jerrylentz/The Feed!
http://www.jerrylentz.com/podcast/podcast.xmlOn the Facebook Podcast Fan Page!
http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Jerry-Lentz-Podcast/147698714963On iTunes!
http://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?id=304095539
Monday, March 15, 2010
Because I have friends working on the New Spider-Man film, I got to see some photos...
Sunday, March 14, 2010
In a continuing effort to create my own religion...
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Who do you think you are? Touching me there! In my heart. Like that!
Friday, March 12, 2010
When I'm not outside riding horses, or mending fences, or moving cattle across the plains, I love to...
Sometimes it's clips of movies I want to see!
Sometimes it's trailers of films I want to see!
Sometimes it's documentaries about things I find interesting!
Sometimes it's videos of people I'm curious about!
Thursday, March 11, 2010
While watching the bruise from a hematoma due to a torn vein grow and darken...
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
I saw this image in a moment of sadness in the film...
Tuesday, March 09, 2010
The audio in this New video was inspired by a dream I just had...
Monday, March 08, 2010
This blog has moved
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Sunday, March 07, 2010
If you're like the Millions of viewers that missed the Academy Awards, just listen!
http://jerrylentz.podomatic.com/On Blubrry!
http://www.blubrry.com/jerrylentz/The Feed!
http://www.jerrylentz.com/podcast/podcast.xmlOn the Facebook Podcast Fan Page!
http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Jerry-Lentz-Podcast/147698714963On iTunes!
http://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?id=304095539
Saturday, March 06, 2010
Lately I found myself in situations where girls want to show me their panties!
Friday, March 05, 2010
The Weight I'm shedding falls off my body everywhere but...
Thursday, March 04, 2010
Recent stats show a huge increase in my podcast radio show downloads! SUCCESS!
I'd like to thank everyone who has been so kind in subscribing to the show, sharing it with friends, with families, with other inmates, and those who have re-tweeted it, posted it on their Facebook profiles and even became a fan on the Jerry Lentz Podcast Facebook Fan Page!
You have no idea how much that means to me!
Please checkout today's episode featuring these topics and others; Mean People, Dating Rapists, Phlebotomy, Earth Ends, Oscars, Ghosts, Mutants, UFO Files Destroyed, Monsters Frozen in Time and More!
Listen NOW!
On Podomatic!
http://jerrylentz.podomatic.com/
On Blubrry!
http://www.blubrry.com/jerrylentz/
The Feed!
http://www.jerrylentz.com/podcast/podcast.xml
On the Facebook Podcast Fan Page!
http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Jerry-Lentz-Podcast/147698714963
On iTunes!
http://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?id=304095539
Wednesday, March 03, 2010
Sometimes the keys to the mysteries in your life will cut you!
We go up against those things we're afraid of, because we can't go around them.
Be happy while you’re living, for you are a long time dead and no one living knows what it is to be dead. Those who dwell among the beauties and mysteries of the earth are never alone or weary of life. Let mystery have its place in you; do not be always turning up your whole soil with the ploughshare of self-examination, but leave a little fallow corner in your heart ready for any seed the winds may bring.Tuesday, March 02, 2010
I was trying to do something good and I got this!
While donating plasma the girl shoving the thick needle in me decided to fish around inside for my vein while the needle was in me.
Painful, but I endured. Then after my blood was being pumped out, I felt a tingling and numbing sensation. I looked down and there was a giant knot on my arm. Swelling. From my elbow down it all went numb! An alarm on the machine goes off! "Blood Clot Warning!" A crowd gathers round and my arm continues to swell! They can't put my blood back into me. There's air in the hose! They scramble with ice-packs. People around me seem tense. They talk of me going to an Emergency Room, Hospital, Ambulance, Gurney, Help... I tell them I feel fine. I'm ashamed to tell them I don't have Health Insurance. I talk my way out of it. My arm hurts. I'm walked to my car. I tell them I'm not dizzy, though I in fact am. I drive to Red Lobster and using my Xmas Gift Card from my brother, I enjoy a flounder and broccoli. Heard a man seated next to me tell his wife, in public, in the restaurant, where I and everyone could hear, "...just get a small salad, because you are too fat." She wasn't at all, and I could see she was hurt by his words, but said nothing to him. Why are some people so mean? The food is good, but I begin to feel bad, weak, woozy and wish my mother was alive to make me feel better like she always could. Once, when I was lil' and very sick with a cold, my mom woke up in the middle of the night to rub Vick's Vapor Rub on my chest, because she was so sweet, but it was late and she was sleepy so by mistake she rubbed me down with cold cream. Today marks the second day of my 4th month on my low-carb lifestyle and while I've lost a lot of weight, there is more to lose, and one thing I've discovered is my heart is heavy and full of love. Came home to relax and my friend and Technical Director of my radio show/podcast, Steve sends me info about "The Coffee Party" a growing group that feels "The Tea Party" does not speak for them. It looks like she's standing in the cold of climate change. I wonder what Doug Stanhope would say about that? Watched the video of this very cute girl in the snow, I like what she's saying, however I don't drink coffee, but if there was a Water Party... But then the water would have frozen in her hands. I got cold watching this, but fired up on the inside. Maybe I should start, "The Water Party?" I wish you were here to be with me and make me feel better about my hematoma and tell me it was gonna be alright and we could watch Bruce Lee movies together.Monday, March 01, 2010
Today has been a funky one, I don't feel quite myself.
I woke up in a down mood. It was dark and gloomy. Of course it was dark, it was 3:14am, but the gloom was of restless sleep. Troubled dreams. I felt uneasy and had was seemed like the shakes. I was cold. I even took to wearing a coat inside the house.
Maybe it's my weightless? But I should be happy with the weight I've lost, but I happened to find online a calculator for ideal height and weight for men my size and I almost broke down in tears when I saw that to be "ideal" I would have to lose another 60 pounds! Trying to keep busy and not depressed, I moved furniture around and made messes of things. I wrote and learned nothing from it. I attempted to make something beautiful, but only created a deformed monster with a heart of gold. I made some songs out of loops and noises and prayers. I made a spoken word audio file that I hoped would be special and pretty, but has turned uglier with every play. An old radio consultant friend of mine from years back sent me an article in an Radio and Music Industry Magazine where I just made the Radio Personality Fantasy Pick by an awesome owner of a radio station! I wish he would make his dream come true! Gee, all he'd have to do is ask! Here's the article, you'll have to look for my name amid other names such as Howard Stern, Scott Shannon, Bill Murray, Kane and Larry Lujack, but Goddamn it, it's there! http://www.fmqb.com/article.asp?id=1510345 That should have made me feel better, someone cool enough to imagine me as part of his ideal radio station, and it did, but I come crashing down thinking, "It'll never happen... He'll never call. It's just HIS dream." Moved more furniture around. If I can change my environment, maybe I will feel better. No, just my muscles become sore and my back begins to ache. Maybe I'll go donate some more plasma? $40 would be good right now and besides, it gives me a reason to lay down and read, right? I go, but they say my heart-rate is too high! They ask if I've had any caffiene? No, I don't drink coffee or cokes. They reject me. I can't even donate without failing! At home, I read a bit and find this quote from Arthur Rimbaud, "I say you have to be a visionary, make yourself a visionary! A Poet makes himself a visionary through a long, boundless, and systematized disorganization of all the senses." In my head, I hear the voice scream, "If we never did anything, we'd never be anybody... So, let's do something, right NOW!" Okay, I made a short film using two young pretty friends, thinking maybe people will enjoy it more with them in it, than seeing ugly old me. I wanted it to be like a distant dream, a poem to youth and love, something like Derek Jarman might make, but without a lot of the gayness and references to the Queen and Christ, but something beautiful from my heart, my eyes and cobbled from the best images in the footage and sewn together to my music and voice. Maybe you can watch it and find something nice and sweet to say to me. Something that will make me feel better. Have you ever been really down about something and then someone said something to you, or did something for you to lift your spirits? What was it? I need it!


