Not a week goes by there isn't some friend asking me, "Where is your...

...film?"

At one time I was the next big thing. Offers. Meetings. Lunches. And somehow I gave up on it, or it just all slipped away.

Now, just as Coppola once predicted that there will be a time where making films will be so cheap that everyone could do it and then some little fat girl will make a masterpiece. Now I know so many people that are making films!

Friends I used to have that at the time had no real interest in films, that I would have to drag to the movies, are now making films and going to festivals and having a great life. Where did I go wrong?

Is it because I have no ideas? No! I have plenty!

Is it because I'm scared? Probably. It hurts when you aim for something good and miss the mark even slightly.

Is it the hard work? Most likely. It's so much easier to just picture it all in my head rather than having to deal with all the people it takes to make a film.

What am I afraid of? Not making a good film. Being disappointed. Having the film not sell. Having the actors feel bad about how they performed. Losing the investor's money.

These really are silly reasons not to make a film; So what if it doesn't sell? I could make a film that cost nothing. No investors to worry about! So what if it's bad? Make another one! Who cares if the actors didn't like their performances? Have them do it again in another film! Big deal if I didn't like the film, next time maybe I'll get it right?

Jeez Louise! What is my problem? Do I really care if no one sees the films I make? Who am I making my films for anyway?

One time my Doctor asked me, "What really makes you happy and when are you at your happiest?" And the very first thing that popped into my head was when I'm behind the camera shooting something. Hunting a good image. Capturing a moment. Then editing shots together. It makes time disappear.

He then said, "That's the thing you are meant to do!"

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I wish I could cook!

I think I could, but I'd hate to have to clean up!

The house would smell of food. I can't stand that! Maybe one day I will have a huge kitchen, or maybe one that is outside so the smell won't be in the house. 

Mainly, I make salads.

Been watching, "Julie & Julia" with Meryl Streep as Julia Child and Amy Adams is Julie Powell in writer-director Nora Ephron's film and I'm digging it! Didn't really know if I would, but I do!

I've had lots of friends that are great cooks, one even wrote for a major cooking magazine, one was a food critic and one was a chef at a big time foo foo restaurant. I even had one friend that was all three. They all were great to hangout with, taking me to eat, making dishes for me, trying things out on me. Food can be fun! Great food can be so much more fun if I'm not paying for it!

I wish I could cook, cause maybe I would know how to make cheap foods taste so much better and be healthier for me!

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I'm so ready for a change in my life!

I can't stand myself. Boring. Depressed. Fat. Bald. Back Hair. Ugly. Stupid. Big Footed. Bad Speller. Horrible Grammar.

So want to be someone else for a change! Want to do something different with my life. Start a new life!

I look at all the job sites, Yahoo, Monster, Simply Hired, Craigslist... Nothing looks good. Can't do any of them. What is a good industry now anyway?

Keep thinking maybe I need to move to another country. Maybe there are better jobs over there? Where ever that is. Maybe some other country would love to have an American like me around like a mascot, maybe I'd stand out?

Do I really want to work anyway? I hate work! I know I have skills. Just no visibly marketable skills. I send out resume after resume and I get nothing.

When I'm out in the world walking around, shopping, going places... I never see anyone my age! Where are they? I never see them in offices, in stores, in factories. I look around to my friends that are like me, or maybe a lil' bit like me and they all work for themselves.

Is it too late for me to recreate myself into something fantastic? Am I too old? I need to figure out how I can stay hidden, indoors, away from people, working alone, by myself and still generate enough income to keep my extravagant lifestyle. What can I do?

I read all the time in biographies and nonfiction books how someone gives a guy a job, or recommends them, or finds and mentors them and they become great. I've never had that!

Am I that unlovable?

Sleep is not working for me lately. Could it be broke?

I'm so tired, but sleep won't come to me easily. It needs to be coaxed. It acts like a mule that won't budge. I try, but it's no use.

I drift. I become weightless. Then I feel someone else is in the room. I toss and turn. I sigh and flip my pillows, but it's no use.

Again, I start to drift off. Sleep slides over me like a soft blanket. I sink deeper into the bed.

Then, I'm startled by the feeling of another presence in the room. Someone is here. Watching me. I'm scared.

I don't dare open my eyes. I don't think it's a ghost. I don't think it's an alien.

What scares me more than anything is that if I look, it might be me standing there looking back!

Sinking down you're not climbing
Sinking feeling you're not trying
Sinking ships made of paper dreams
All your hopes and dreams are screaming

It's you that I've always wanted
but I lost you
too scared to call, I never knew
I wanted, I wanted, I wanted,
but nothing ever came through
Made it so hard to want again

It's so true

You put all you hopes in prayers
like notes to God in a balloon
The storm is rising, but you will be saved
for you're the message in a bottle
you will not drown
not at all

I once thought you were lost
but turns out it was me
How could I not see

I'm the one that never believed in me
But you
You always believed in me
you always believed in me
you always believed in me

Today I feel so stuck!

I want to scream cause I can't move, because there's things I want to do and can't, because there's dreams I have that I can't make real, because I feel I'm sinking, because I'm not what I want to be, because I can't be with you, because they're dead and I'm still alive, because I never met them, because I'm not rich, because they move ahead even though they cheat and steal, because I give and get nothing back, because I'm so tired of fighting, because I'm so tired of trying, because I'm so tired of crying, because when I move I want to sit still and when I sit I want to move on, because when I make money, it gets taken away, because when I take a step forward, I have to take three steps back, because you're not here to show me, because I have already forgotten what she looks like, because so much time has passed and nothing has changed.

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I'm so sick of people using the phrase, "Think outside the box!"

I appreciate what it means, but change up a bit please.

Wonder if any of the millions that live in cardboard boxes because their situation got out of hand, or beyond their control ever say, "I need to think outside the box?"

I've found the bosses that used it in meetings I've been in, were the very people that did the same thing over and over, playing it safe, no risk, and were quick to throw you under a bus whenever their job depended on it. 

Once, stuck in LA traffic, just setting there daydreaming, I looked over at this guy sitting in his cardboard refrigerator box eating out of a can of beans, and I started thinking what if my time came up in the scheme of the matrix where it was my turn to be out there, homeless, no love, no hope, no healthcare, where would I go to find a quality cardboard box to live in?

Still setting there in traffic, I'm thinking about packing myself up in a cardboard box and shipping myself to an island somewhere, but postage rates are outrageous! 

Then the cars behind me start honking because traffic is moving and I'm just sitting there daydreaming. 

I wish I could daydream happy thoughts! I need better thoughts. I need to think differently. I need to change my thinking!

I need to think outside the box!

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Kicking around the idea of jumping in my car and hitting the road!

Sometimes when all else fails to enliven my existence and shock the boredom away, I feel the need to drive. I believe my situation calls for a prolonged and butt numbing drive across many states.

Unburied the portable cooler from the bottom of the cluttered closet, I won it from one of "the no longer in operation" banks for opening up a checking account. I'll stock it full of bottled water, and lowcarb goodies like, lunch-meat, tuna, spinach, and such.

I'll need some aspirin and some painkillers, while I'm at it maybe some muscle relaxers and I should stop off at Sam's Club and pick up a Family Size box of condoms. Need to get some bullets for the handgun under my seat, in case I get lucky. Wait, that lucky thing was suppose to go with the condom sentence. Remember to change that!

Should go get my back waxed, too, cause if I'm getting condoms... Just being prepared. I want to be pleasing to whoever I might find that might in anyway... nevermind.

Lost a lot of weight so feeling kinda sexy, maybe I should pick up some tighter trousers and smaller panties. Gee, I wonder if I might need a smaller sized condom? If it's too big a condom... What do I...? Remember to bring duct tape! It fixes everything! Nothing kills the mood like fussing with a rubber!

Maps! Gotta get some maps! Check the tires and maybe get a tuneup! Change the oil! Clean the car! Get some air-freshener thing to hang from the rear view mirror, too.

Load up iPod with cool traveling tunes, nothing sad, but no disco, Selena Gomez or Taylor Swift... Rush, that's what I need some Rush and Hawkwind, Motorhead, Black Sabbath, the classics, man! Oh, and even bring some tapes in case the charge on the iPods wears down. 

Bring the video equipment! I might make a documentary of the trip! Interview people!

Now, I just need to figure out where I'm going?

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I used to love playing cards!

When I was in 3rd grade I found a desk of nudie playing cards in a ditch. 

Free Education! 

I learned so much! Not just about playing cards but about women's bodies. It had been a complete mystery to me up until then.

Also learned I could make money from the cards. Not just from gambling on Crazy 8, but from charging to look at the naked girls!

Gum, Marbles, Coin... The World was MINE for the taking!

I let one kid, Todd, who begged me to look, see one card, he did, but then wanted the Quarter back or he was gonna tell. Women's bodies really scared him I guess. He threatened to go tell the teacher. 

I wasn't about to refund the Quarter, but he stormed off across the playground to the school. Panic set in and I quickly tore out a page from my Big Chief Writing Tablet and scribbled:

"Todd, I am not giving you back your nekkid woman pictures! I think it is wrong for you to have this and I am going to give it to the Principle if you don't! Jerry"

Wrapped it around the deck of cards and shoved it into my pockets. 

Sure enough, here came the Teacher stomping across the playground with Todd all smiles running along side. 

Pussy-Ass-Snitch!

But guess who got paddled by the Principal?

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If it's Weird, You'll Hear it Here!

Please listen to the New Podcast Episode and hear about; Health Care Legislation Passes, Conan, Shia LaBeouf, Rosie O'Donnell, Captain America, Mike Tyson, The Hobbit, Peter Lorre, Boris Karloff, Ted Koppel, Dame Judi Dench, Wilhelm Reich, Harold Robbins and More Fun!

On Podomatic!
http://jerrylentz.podomatic.com/

On Blubrry!
http://www.blubrry.com/jerrylentz/

The Feed!
http://www.jerrylentz.com/podcast/podcast.xml

On the Facebook Podcast Fan Page!
http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Jerry-Lentz-Podcast/147698714963

On iTunes!
http://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?id=304095539

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It's Sunday, there's snow and ice and cold outside...

...I'm bored so I've pulled out my Patrice Dupont designed 1969 22GF "UFO" portable Philips record player, applied some glitter and metallic eye shadow and I'm playing Roxy Music, baby! 

I was watching, "Kelly's Heroes" again today, before the Glam Rock Makeover, and find it funny that Sgt. Oddball (Donald Sutherland) is using current military psyop stuff and they think he's the crazy one.

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I give and I give and I give...!

I believe I'm experiencing strange new moods and I wonder if it's from the two plasma donations I do every week?

I seem to rest more deeply now when I sleep. Dreams are more intense. I feel happier. My concentration is more focused. And even my weightless is continuing, as I seem to have broken a long plateau.

But as you may be able to tell from a recent song I wrote and produced, I hate needles! 

Once, at a get together with a woman that lived above me who was briefly in the Manson Family, I had somehow gained her confidence and when everyone had left she opened up to me to the incredible life she had lived. 

In a velvet lined wooden box that contained her syringe was a guitar string she caught when Jimmy Page tossed it to the studio audience after it broke while the Yardbirds played, "Heart Full of Soul" for some English TV show. She had used it as a tourniquet, but now was trying to kick heroin. 

"You're creative. Can you make this into a bracelet for me? Might save me," she said with a smile.

Went to see "Sherlock Holmes" for $3 today, then when it was over stepped out into gray, wet, cold, London-like weather. It had a weird 3D feeling, as though I were still in the movie, but without the explosive action, quick pacing and rapid editing. 

Then it started sleeting! 

Ahh, Spring!

Reading a biography about one of my favorite actresses, Dame Judi Dench and while I still love her work, I was disturbed to learn she loves sneaking up behind people and giving them a "wedgie" right before they step out on stage. 

What a bitch!

A girl I once knew let it slip that her pet name for her man was "Inchworm" so I thought she meant he had a small penis. She realized this by my expression and quickly clarified that he didn't, but that she liked to bounce up and down on him. 

But we didn't believe her.

"Ride up and down and up and down! I love you!"

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Been looking for the perfect desk for my needs...

...and budget, which means free, if possible.
 

I write a lot so I need something comfortable to sit on too, while I dream up my stories and maybe something to inspire me, a muse of a desk, if you will.

I record my voice work, audiobook narrations, commercials, movie trailers in a very small sound booth, but having a desk that I enjoy being around for long periods and that supports my needs would be very sweet.

I shoot video for my vlog and podcasts so having a desk to sit at while recording my thoughts and commentaries while keeping abreast of the latest news would be very helpful.

I need something I could lay my head on and think about what I'm going to do next.

I would love a desk to help with all that! 

I wouldn't treat the desk horribly either. I would clean it and love it. I'd keep it so clean I bet I could see my own reflection in it. It would feel good to the touch. Nice and smooth as I rub my hands across it. 

If I happened to get too excited about something and spilled some juice on it, I would quickly rub it off the face of the desk until it was clean and shiny again. I would care for it some much, because I knew it was taking care of me as well.

If by some strange atmospheric disturbance I was thrown into an alternate dimension where this beautiful desk was a woman, and I were a desk, I would be happy to let her sit her beautiful soft round bottom on me, or if she were leaning across to grab a sheet of paper, feel the bottom of her breasts caress my face with their warm soft weight. When she relaxes, she is welcome to stretch her long sleek legs across me as she dreams up ideas, plans, and schemes that will make her happy. I can feel her finger tips tickling me as she types and I could see her beautiful face as she looks into me for her reflection when she applies her lipstick. 

I would feel satisfied that I was there for her as she is for me.

But I suppose my favorite thing is that excitement I get when she reaches into my drawers!

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It's like I have the power to cloud a man's mind... My own Mind!

Had a good 8 hours of horrifying dreams that I couldn't wake from! 

Terrible stuff. Two airliners colliding over water. Me inside one of them. People falling to their death. The fuselage peeling open next to me to reveal the earth rushing up to meet the plane. I can see the mangled shadow of the plane as we approach our pending doom!

Today is the Birthday of Edgar Cayce was the born in 1877. Known as the "sleeping prophet," and was the most documented psychic of the 20th century, giving readings to thousands of seekers while in a trance state.

I wonder if my dream was a prophecy or was it because I huffed a half a can of Reddi-Wip before going to bed?

Thought I should post this in case it comes true about the 2 planes crashing. I hate having nightmares like this! Especially the scary ones like this that involve me. It's like there's a big book of fate and it has my name on it and Death is a census taker ready to mark my name off.

Have you ever had a nightmare that came true?

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I wanted to get all Green today!

I didn't wear Green because I was hoping for pinches, but sadly... I got none. So maybe this will help?

I'm having an Irish Film Fest Tonight, I wish you were here with me to watch.

I miss him so much! But now I can have my very own Conan O'Brien Leprechaun! They're always after his Lucky Charms!

http://tinyurl.com/yajxazh

They're Magically Delicious! Dang, I'm hungry! 

Hearts, Moons, Stars, Clovers... Hmm, Hearts. That should be low carb, right?Isn't a heart just meaty muscle? 

How about watching movies with me and eating corned beef and cabbage, apple mash, Irish soda bread, spinach, asparagus, leafy greens, potatoes, rice with parsley, and a minty green dessert or drink... Like a Mojito? 

Hey, it's GREEN?

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If you love Animation, Filmmaking and Art, this podcast episode is for you!

Kathy Schoeppner is a producer and former artist for the Walt Disney Animation Studios who is producing educational animation and documentary films. Her artwork has appeared in numerous galleries. She talks about animation, filmmaking, fundraising and art.

I've known Kathy for 18 years, she once had the awesome job of being my intern, then she went on to pursued her other dreams, because let's face it, if my intern is really good, they'll never have to work for me again! Seriously, Kathy is a great person and whatever she can dream up, she'll make it happen!

I wish I could be like that!

Her current project can be seen here:
http://www.refresheverything.com/deceptiveDragon

Enjoy the show!

On Podomatic!
http://jerrylentz.podomatic.com/

On Blubrry!
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The Feed!
http://www.jerrylentz.com/podcast/podcast.xml

On the Facebook Podcast Fan Page!
http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Jerry-Lentz-Podcast/147698714963

On iTunes!
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Because I have friends working on the New Spider-Man film, I got to see some photos...

...and I have to say I'm disappointed in the new costume and the look of the new actor in it!

But it's still early and maybe this is just a test?

I was saddened to hear that Peter Graves, from "Stalag 17" "Mission: Impossible" "Airplane!" and a ton of awesome things, has died. He was 83.

I met him back in the late 90s in a bookstore. We were both looking at books of poetry and he saw I was holding a copy of Garrison Keillor's "Good Poems" and he said, "I have that book."

"A friend got this for me and I wanted to get another to give as a gift to my brother."

He smiled, "That's nice."

We were just standing there alone in the aisle for a moment then I said, "What was it like working with Timothy Carey? Was he as wild as he seems?"

I was embarrassed that I asked, but it was the first thing that popped into my mind. I didn't want it to be a question he always gets asked and I did want to know.

"Oh, I can't say," he smiled and I think he even winked, but then I wondered later if he couldn't say because he wasn't a tattletale or that he just didn't remember? He walked away at that moment and I wished I had asked him something else.

He seemed like a great guy willing to have fun and never be too serious, like when he played Capt. Clarence Oveur, "Joey, do you like movies about gladiators?"

During the 1990s, Graves hosted the documentary series "Biography" on A&E, and by a strange coincidence I just received my big check from the Biography Channel show I did, so maybe that means my appearance on the channel will be airing soon! I hope they let me know when.

I hope I don't suck!

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In a continuing effort to create my own religion...

...the roadblocks I have encountered is that I really don't like many people I come in contact with, I have no skills I can offer in the way of healing them and I don't like meetings.

Now, if I could have a religion that worships say, "Me" for example, and that's fine, I would however like the followers to be at some distance, contact me via "Prayer Email," send donations through PayPal, stuff like that and maybe every once in a while have a "Special" meeting with the females for a "Laying on of Hands," blessing them and their beautiful bodies and maybe "Speaking in Tongues," if you dig what I mean.

But then really, what do I have to offer?

I again, can't heal anyone. I can't bring anyone back from the dead. I can't give anyone an afterlife. 

Don't even have a great story. No characters like, Angels, Demons, Aliens, Robots...

Need to work something up that's unique, original, sexy!

Need some books I can sell, need to write them first! Ones with awesome pictures and big print. Maybe even a pop-up book!

There are so many goofy religions, cults, groups, that have large followings that are as empty of ideas as mine, but they still prosper. Also, I don't want any dudes in my cult! That I've decided! Just me, the "Leader" and a bunch of cool, hot, sexy ladies dressed provocatively, singing and dancing and worshiping me.

Got to figure out a good story that will bring the gals to my Church. What's the pitch? What will hook them in? Oprah has a lot a ladies, maybe I could give away free cars, or shoes... What do sexy potential cult babes want?

See? This is where I always end up. The plan never gets completed. I wish I were smarter, but then I know smarts has nothing to do with it! 

Maybe it's just too silly to think I could have a big mansion filled with beautiful followers captivated by my magnetic and charismatic presence and them, half nude, willing to do my bidding at all hours, pleasing their Master. I know I couldn't stop giggling at it all. I would ruin it! Sabotage it!

I guess my Momma didn't raise no cult leader!

Maybe I could find just one beautiful woman and worship her and then she'd worship me and we'd take turns doing each others bidding? Maybe that's a better idea?

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Who do you think you are? Touching me there! In my heart. Like that!

How could she have such power over me. She hadn't been in my life for what seemed like years, but there she was in my thoughts and in my dreams and then finally out on my lawn. The sky was Red. The sun just below the horizon. It was warm. Her spring dress was Yellow and she was staring up at me when she said, "Have you even thought about me at all?"

"Well, I've been doing my taxes, so I've been occupied."

She just wanted to come back and hurt me some more. Drain me. Weaken me. She was the mosquito that hovers near you, but when you reach out to grab it, she's gone.

Once when I was little, my oldest brother opened up my Silly Putty® egg container, stole the Silly Putty® and replaced it with a scoop of creamy peanut butter! 

Later, I paid him back by making a sandwich for him of jelly and Silly Putty®!

That was the first step I took in not letting anyone get one over on me. I will retaliate!

She would whisper in your ear that you are the only one, but you'd find out from the various detectives and the photos and videos and wiretaps they provided you that you were one of many. One in a long line of suckers. Amusements. Toys to torture.

She'd make you feel safe. Act like she trusted you. She wanted your trust, too. Tell you you didn't need a condom. Tell you she couldn't have a baby because of the accident. Tell you she would bring another girl into your bed with her for you two to share because she loved you so much she wanted you to be happy. 

You knew she was lying all the time, but you played along to see how the story unfolded, because you love a good story even if your character is the one that dies in the end.

At the sink, I heard the screen door slam. I didn't look, but it was her coming back. I shut the water off. Sat my glass down. Turned to see her in the doorway. Her long dark hair was wet. Crying. Her Barbie Red round purse suitcase sat next to her bare feet. "I'm sorry," she whispered. She undid some buttons and let her wet dress fall.

In the morning I awoke to find her gone. This was confirmed when I found the note she left on the mirror in lipstick that simply said, "I'm gone!"

I'm burning all my belongings, with only my jeans, Titmouse tshirt, Doc Martens, and Leather Jacket, I'm stealing the Purple Dodge Challenger SRT8 parked outside, with the cash from the liquor store robbery in a Gucci knapsack, I'm leaving the burning rubble behind and driving as fast as I can to get you!

While driving, in the rear view mirror I see the flames and think about my personal act of terrorism. “Jihad Jane,” my friends told me, was an "attractive" woman, so I was kinda let down when I finally saw her in the paper. Al Qaeda needs to attract US-born fashion models to terrorism. Because in my head, I pictured thin, long legged, hand on hip, runway models exploding.

I pictured her exploding. 

It made me hard, it made me smile and made the miles and the boredom pass by more quickly.

I pictured me pushing her against the wall, lifting her dress, picking her legs up, spreading her legs around my hips and shoving myself into her again and again until I come and then having her explode all over me and the White wall of the house and like the White walls of the small hospital room where she first found me. Blood Red streaks on the White walls radiating out from where my cock detonated inside her.

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When I'm not outside riding horses, or mending fences, or moving cattle across the plains, I love to...

...watch videos!

By now Dear Reader, you've learned I love watching the Watch Instantly Netflix movies and videos on YouTube, so here is a small sampling of things I've enjoyed these last few days. Whether they're small videos or larger documentaries, I find that seeking out these small nuggets of visual entertainment is not that unlike mining for gold. There is a lot of dirt out there, but sometimes something shiny is surfaced.

Sometimes it's videos of things I want!

Sometimes it's clips of movies I want to see!

Sometimes it's trailers of films I want to see!

Sometimes it's documentaries about things I find interesting!

Sometimes it's videos of people I'm curious about!

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While watching the bruise from a hematoma due to a torn vein grow and darken...

...on my arm, I thought I would write a poem, then put it to music with my friend, Marilyn Franco.

Just goofing around, trying to create something and in the process, cheer myself up. I hope you like it!
 

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I saw this image in a moment of sadness in the film...

...Ken Burns made about Mark Twain.

http://www.pbs.org/marktwain/

Mark Twain is out of a job at a paper in San Francisco, he can't afford food, drink, or to pay his rent. He walks the back alleys avoiding friends and collections. This amazing imagine is used at that moment. I think it's beautiful, haunting and sad, all at once.

I miss SF terribly. I feel I could live there again if I happen to win a big lottery. It was a happy friendly city to me at the time I was there, but it became too expensive and my income was sliding down. I should have fought harder to make it work. It's a beautiful city! 

At lunch with two of my brothers yesterday, the talk of course was about America, the economy and job loss. I wondered in my head how long this depression would last. I know it's nothing like the Great Depression, but to those without money or jobs, the comparison is pointless. The people I know who are still hanging on to their jobs find they are making less money and doing the work of several people who are no longer employed. Many people, if not most are in complete denial about the situation.

There are people I know who are making more money now than they ever have before and to them the economy is fine. The restaurants are pretty busy, the movie theaters are fairly crowded and almost everyone has an iPhone. 

When the talk turned to a "What are we going to do?" I thought, and said, "Well, I can donate plasma and get $50 a week, so if I can cut all my expenses down below $2600 a year, I'll be okay!"

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The audio in this New video was inspired by a dream I just had...

...where I went to an old church to see a new book I had written that had just been published. There was a reading I was to do for a crowd that was gathering. I picked up the book and thumbed through the pages and all it said was, "I Love You!" over and over and over... 

I told the crowd, "I'm sorry, I don't seem to have all the words I want to say."

Ram Dass was seated next to me, he leaned over and whispered, "You have all the words you need."

I believe you will find listening to this with headphones, to be healing and soothing. If you were to listen repeatedly, I imagine many wonderful and seemingly magical things could come into your life.

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If you're like the Millions of viewers that missed the Academy Awards, just listen!

If you missed the Oscars®, don't forget to hear my Special, "The Jerry Lentz Oscar® Podcast Show" LIVE from the Shag Carpet!

I'm not the only one that was having to look for the Oscar show to be streamed online, Cablevision's 3.1 million subscribers in New York, New Jersey and Connecticut have had their ABC channel taken off.

So, just listen to this podcast for fun, instead!

I think it'll be fun to listen to, to kill time in your ear while you are at school, or work, or getting that prostate exam. I try to leave all the boring stuff out and leave in only the exciting bits with me talking, rambling on and talking dirty and asking trivia questions...

Oh, you'll love it!

Thanks to all the production staff and interns for helping put the show together and thanks especially to Technical Director of the show, Steve Kellener for creating a private live feed from Hollywood to the studio all at the last minute when all other normal options failed!

Enjoy!

On Podomatic!
http://jerrylentz.podomatic.com/

On Blubrry!
http://www.blubrry.com/jerrylentz/

The Feed!
http://www.jerrylentz.com/podcast/podcast.xml

On the Facebook Podcast Fan Page!
http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Jerry-Lentz-Podcast/147698714963

On iTunes!
http://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?id=304095539

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Lately I found myself in situations where girls want to show me their panties!

Maybe my weight loss has drawn skinny girls into my world who feel the need to undress in front of me. I'm not complaining mind you! I just find it interesting.

Seems kind of magical to me! I like it!

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The Weight I'm shedding falls off my body everywhere but...

 

...where I want it!

Losing weight has been fairly easy for me. I'm shrinking all over. Even my big fat head is getting smaller. However, my belly still pooches out! Damn it!

I look malnurished. Bloated belly. Bruises on my arm. Just add some Fake Bake Bronzing Cream and some flies around my face and I got my own sweet charity! 

Speaking of Giving; I've had some recent contributions to the documentary funds and I thank all of those cool and sweet enough to want to help me make this film!

http://www.indiegogo.com/Travel-with-Spirits-Ghosts-and-Haunted-Houses

Maybe you can help, too? Even just a $1 would be so appreciated and I know you'd feel great doing it! 

With the media attention I've been receiving from the BioChannel all the way to the BBC and others in between, funding this would surely be betting on a Winner!

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Recent stats show a huge increase in my podcast radio show downloads! SUCCESS!

I'd like to thank everyone who has been so kind in subscribing to the show, sharing it with friends, with families, with other inmates, and those who have re-tweeted it, posted it on their Facebook profiles and even became a fan on the Jerry Lentz Podcast Facebook Fan Page!

You have no idea how much that means to me!

Please checkout today's episode featuring these topics and others; Mean People, Dating Rapists, Phlebotomy, Earth Ends, Oscars, Ghosts, Mutants, UFO Files Destroyed, Monsters Frozen in Time and More!

Listen NOW!

On Podomatic!

http://jerrylentz.podomatic.com/

On Blubrry!

http://www.blubrry.com/jerrylentz/

The Feed!

http://www.jerrylentz.com/podcast/podcast.xml

On the Facebook Podcast Fan Page!

http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Jerry-Lentz-Podcast/147698714963

On iTunes!

http://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?id=304095539

Posted via email from jerrylentz's posterous

Sometimes the keys to the mysteries in your life will cut you!

We go up against those things we're afraid of, because we can't go around them.

Be happy while you’re living, for you are a long time dead and no one living knows what it is to be dead.

Those who dwell among the beauties and mysteries of the earth are never alone or weary of life.

Let mystery have its place in you; do not be always turning up your whole soil with the ploughshare of self-examination, but leave a little fallow corner in your heart ready for any seed the winds may bring.

Posted via email from jerrylentz's posterous

I was trying to do something good and I got this!

While donating plasma the girl shoving the thick needle in me decided to fish around inside for my vein while the needle was in me.

Painful, but I endured. Then after my blood was being pumped out, I felt a tingling and numbing sensation. I looked down and there was a giant knot on my arm. Swelling. From my elbow down it all went numb!

An alarm on the machine goes off!

"Blood Clot Warning!"

A crowd gathers round and my arm continues to swell!

They can't put my blood back into me. There's air in the hose! They scramble with ice-packs. People around me seem tense. They talk of me going to an Emergency Room, Hospital, Ambulance, Gurney, Help...

I tell them I feel fine. I'm ashamed to tell them I don't have Health Insurance. I talk my way out of it.

My arm hurts. I'm walked to my car. I tell them I'm not dizzy, though I in fact am. I drive to Red Lobster and using my Xmas Gift Card from my brother, I enjoy a flounder and broccoli.

Heard a man seated next to me tell his wife, in public, in the restaurant, where I and everyone could hear, "...just get a small salad, because you are too fat." She wasn't at all, and I could see she was hurt by his words, but said nothing to him. Why are some people so mean?

The food is good, but I begin to feel bad, weak, woozy and wish my mother was alive to make me feel better like she always could.

Once, when I was lil' and very sick with a cold, my mom woke up in the middle of the night to rub Vick's Vapor Rub on my chest, because she was so sweet, but it was late and she was sleepy so by mistake she rubbed me down with cold cream.

Today marks the second day of my 4th month on my low-carb lifestyle and while I've lost a lot of weight, there is more to lose, and one thing I've discovered is my heart is heavy and full of love.

Came home to relax and my friend and Technical Director of my radio show/podcast, Steve sends me info about "The Coffee Party" a growing group that feels "The Tea Party" does not speak for them.

It looks like she's standing in the cold of climate change. I wonder what Doug Stanhope would say about that?

Watched the video of this very cute girl in the snow, I like what she's saying, however I don't drink coffee, but if there was a Water Party...

But then the water would have frozen in her hands. I got cold watching this, but fired up on the inside.

Maybe I should start, "The Water Party?"

I wish you were here to be with me and make me feel better about my hematoma and tell me it was gonna be alright and we could watch Bruce Lee movies together.

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Today has been a funky one, I don't feel quite myself.

I woke up in a down mood. It was dark and gloomy. Of course it was dark, it was 3:14am, but the gloom was of restless sleep. Troubled dreams. I felt uneasy and had was seemed like the shakes. I was cold. I even took to wearing a coat inside the house.

Maybe it's my weightless?

But I should be happy with the weight I've lost, but I happened to find online a calculator for ideal height and weight for men my size and I almost broke down in tears when I saw that to be "ideal" I would have to lose another 60 pounds!

Trying to keep busy and not depressed, I moved furniture around and made messes of things. I wrote and learned nothing from it. I attempted to make something beautiful, but only created a deformed monster with a heart of gold.

I made some songs out of loops and noises and prayers. I made a spoken word audio file that I hoped would be special and pretty, but has turned uglier with every play.

An old radio consultant friend of mine from years back sent me an article in an Radio and Music Industry Magazine where I just made the Radio Personality Fantasy Pick by an awesome owner of a radio station! I wish he would make his dream come true! Gee, all he'd have to do is ask!

Here's the article, you'll have to look for my name amid other names such as Howard Stern, Scott Shannon, Bill Murray, Kane and Larry Lujack, but Goddamn it, it's there!

http://www.fmqb.com/article.asp?id=1510345

That should have made me feel better, someone cool enough to imagine me as part of his ideal radio station, and it did, but I come crashing down thinking, "It'll never happen... He'll never call. It's just HIS dream."

Moved more furniture around.

If I can change my environment, maybe I will feel better. No, just my muscles become sore and my back begins to ache.

Maybe I'll go donate some more plasma? $40 would be good right now and besides, it gives me a reason to lay down and read, right? I go, but they say my heart-rate is too high! They ask if I've had any caffiene? No, I don't drink coffee or cokes.

They reject me. I can't even donate without failing!

At home, I read a bit and find this quote from Arthur Rimbaud, "I say you have to be a visionary, make yourself a visionary! A Poet makes himself a visionary through a long, boundless, and systematized disorganization of all the senses."

In my head, I hear the voice scream, "If we never did anything, we'd never be anybody... So, let's do something, right NOW!"

Okay, I made a short film using two young pretty friends, thinking maybe people will enjoy it more with them in it, than seeing ugly old me. I wanted it to be like a distant dream, a poem to youth and love, something like Derek Jarman might make, but without a lot of the gayness and references to the Queen and Christ, but something beautiful from my heart, my eyes and cobbled from the best images in the footage and sewn together to my music and voice.

Maybe you can watch it and find something nice and sweet to say to me. Something that will make me feel better. Have you ever been really down about something and then someone said something to you, or did something for you to lift your spirits? What was it? I need it!

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