I was talking to my parole officer the other day and...

...he said, "Have you been working on anything productive to get you out of this state?"

"The state of Alabama?"

"No, this state of depression you are currently in at this moment."

"Well, I came up with an idea for a sitcom about a lonely guy that has been laid off 5 or 6 times, lives in his car and sometimes thanks to friends, sleeps in a dog kennel. He moves back to the small town he grew up and finds the girl of his dreams that he's always loved since a teen. She has two teen daughters from two previous marriages, she owns a home that her ex-husband still lives in while she and the girls live with her mom and step-dad. She wants to marry him, but he has no money coming in, smells like dog poop and he lives in his car. He wants her to be happy and is worried he can't provide the quality of life she and her kids deserve. So then..."

My parole officer, Vince interrupts, "Look Lentz, I watch a lot of TV, good and bad. My favorite shows are, "House" "Hawaii Five-O" and "Doctor Who." Now I've sat through some shitty shows, but I can tell you right now, I would not watch that show you just described. So really, have you been working on anything productive to get you out of this state?"

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